Wednesday, March 11, 2009

March 11, 2009

OK, so I went to the hospital today for my pre-op stuff. They took samples, pictures, and answers to many questions. Many forms were completed. I was also given much information regarding the upcoming “procedure”. I am guessing that the old “operation, or surgery” is now politically incorrect. I think that the most important thing accomplished today was the information gained on the parking situation..... really valuable stuff in a crowded city.

In an effort to slide into a more healthy lifestyle, I decided to actually read the supplied paperwork. Interesting stuff..... I won't bore you with all of the details, but I did find that the “CONSENT TO ANESTHESIA” form was somewhat disturbing. It warns of some risks..... you know, little things like death, cardiac arrest, cardiac arrhythmia, adverse drug reaction, corneal abrasion, damage to the throat and vocal cords, respiratory problems including pneumonia, damage to arteries or veins,headaches, brain and nerve damage (including paralysis, loss of function, and coma),” etc.....

I know that they have to do this, however, what came next is priceless.... “.....this is a teaching facility and that residents, fellows,students and others may assist with or perform all or parts of the administration of anesthesia or performance of medical acts"....... (bold type added for emphasis) I am thinking that students would be bad enough, but others????? This is not a typo, "others" might do "all". Who might the "others" be??? I am picturing the Doc. saying something like “OK kid, why don't you do this one, and try not to screw up ...... again.” Of course, the last line is: “I (the Doc.) have given no guarantee or assurance as to the results that may be obtained."

I think that it is always important to inspire anyone working for you, or on you, to do their best. I really want to be a good patient, and not annoy the people that I am depending on, but they must be kidding. I guess that people just don't read things. I am expecting the old: Doc. says “don't worry, we are not going to let a student work on you”, I say, “but that is what it says”...... and repeat, and repeat. I will try to figure out a way to get rid of that clause without making him angry. Maybe make them cross it out, and then, a bit later, apologize and declare that I am just very nervous. Wish me luck with this one.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is a standard consent form meant to warn you of possibilities. If these things happened all the time, we wouldn't put people to sleep for surgeries. :-) While it is standare, I agree with you and would likely asking for some things to be crossed off (blame it on your illness).

The "others" are likely CRNAs (certified registered nurse anesthesists), highly trained and specialized nurses who are closely supervised by the anesthesiologists (MDs). I'd likely be okay with the MDs and the CRNAs, but might draw the line with "students" unless that referred to the interns and residents (also MDs, in training and closely supervised).

Hope this helped make things clearer for you rather than clear as mud.

JC said...

Thanks for the comment, I didn't mean to attack the industry that you are in. I kinda know what they mean, and this post was written with tongue mostly in cheek.

Having said that, I did quote accurately, and "others" would actually take in ...... well everyone. I guess this post was more of a lampoon on all forms in general. You know, the "we can do anything, and are not responsible for anything" kind. They are everywhere.

Please try not to take me too seriously...... I don't.

Pat said...

John, I have been put under dozens of times and love it. Don't worry, unless, of course, you've seen the old movie "Coma" with Tom ?(Magnum P.I. guy)crap can't remember his last name (maybe the anesthesia causes by memory loss)
Hang in there bud!
Oh..wait a minute....is it Stellack?

Anonymous said...

It think it's Sellack, Pat -- but you were close. :-)

I took no offense, bro. I took it the way it was intended, just thought I'd tell you about at least one of the "others" (the CRNAs). Actually, the "we can do anything and we'reare not responsible" is a pretty good assessment. The try to distance their responsibility, but it never works when the rubber hits the road.

I'll be praying for you tomorrow (and always).

Anonymous said...

I may apply for the "others" job. I hear they make good money.